A Hard-To-Recognize Hazard for Christian Leaders
by Ruth Haley Barton
Dangerous tired is an atmospheric condition of the soul that is volatile and portends the risk of great destruction. It is a chronic inner fatigue accumulating over months (and sometimes years) that doesn't always manifest itself in physical exhaustion. In fact, dangerous tiredness can appear to be quite the opposite because it can actually be masked by excessive activity and compulsive overworking. When we are dangerously tired we feel out of control, compelled to constant activity by inner impulses that we may not even be aware of. For some reason we can't name, we're not able to linger and relax over a cup of coffee. We can't keep from checking voice-mail or e-mail "just one more time" before we leave the office or before we go to bed at night. Rather than reading anything for the sheer pleasure of it, our nightstand is piled high with books and professional journals that cram our heads full of more information that will keep us at "the top of our game." The idea of taking a full day off once a week seems impossible both in theory and in practice. We rarely, if ever, take time for a real break or vacation, choosing instead to work through holidays and break times. Not surprisingly, we might find that even when it is time for well-deserved sleep or rest, we are unable to relax and receive this necessary gift.While our way of life might seem heroic, there is a frenetic quality to our activity that is disturbing to those around us. When we do have discretionary time we indulge in escapist behaviors such as compulsive eating, drinking, spending, television watching—because we are too tired to choose activities that are truly life-giving. When we have drifted into the realm of being dangerously tired, we might also be numb to the full range of human emotion. It might seem like a relief to be unhampered by the negative emotions that bog other people down, but when we are dangerously tired the positive emotions become elusive as well. We don't feel much of anything—the good or the bad.
Does any of that sound too familiar? If so, please read more.
